Unspoken Truth
by xXMiss-GoddessXx
Summary: Mac suddenly learns that Claire is still alive and is in a hospital in Texas. He asks Stella to come with him for moral support. What will happen..? Read & discover!
1. Chapter 1

Here's a story I started some time ago. Hope you like! :)

**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters of CSI:NY.

Unspoken Truth

**Mac**

It was the last thing I thought that could ever happen to me. I never would have believed one minute that this could still happen, that there was still hope. It had been a long time—nine years already. It was still hard to believe right now that this was true, real and not a simple joke. I was afraid to fall asleep at night, thinking I might wake up the next morning and realize it had all been a dream. I was excited but scared at the same time that it might be really different from before. What if it never would be the same again? What if I wouldn't feel the same way? That was the thing that scared me the most. I just wanted to be the same too even if she had changed. I had to stay strong and be there for her. I hadn't even seen her yet and was already worried and anxious. All the worst scenarios had gone through my head already; she may not recognize me, she may not love me anymore, she may have extreme amnesia and not remember anything at all, even her own self! But then again, some part of me was on the bright side and was thinking that she may have been searching for me for a long time, that she still loved me like she did in the past, that she would want to spend the rest of her life with me. I just hope that this part of me was right.

I hadn't told anyone about it yet—not even Stella. I told everything to Stella but this, I had kept it for myself for a few days now. I had been told to take my time, to relax before going there. I had to be completely calm before. How could I, really? I knew I would have to bring someone with me for moral support if anything happened. Only one person came to my mind actually and that was Stella. She had always been there for me through everything I had lived and so had I. She was great, a wonderful friend and I really appreciated that.

I knew that she would understand—and also be very shocked by the news. She and Claire had been great friends in the past and she sometimes said to me that she missed her. She didn't say it often, probably to avoid making me sad. The fact was that Claire was both a great wife and a great friend. She had even said to me once that if something happened to her, that she would like Stella and I to be together. She knew that we were very close and understood each other. I had told her that I would never love somebody more than her and if something ever happened to her, I would spend the rest of my life alone in mourning. I had kept my promise.

Of course, there had been Peyton but it didn't last too long. Even sometimes when I was with her, I would think of Claire—I would actually believe that I was cheating on her. I had struggled a little bit with that and Peyton had noticed it. I think that deep down, she knew I would always love her and of course, never forget her. I still loved her today and I don't think anyone could ever replace her. I couldn't say I hadn't though of Stella as a possible lover—I had in fact thought of it on many occasions. Stella was a wonderful, caring woman but I couldn't really see starting a relationship with her. We were partners, had been working together for a long time and she was one of Claire's good friends. I liked her, maybe even loved her in some kind of way but... it would be too complicated. It scared me to start something serious with someone that close, that I had known forever. I knew Stella like the back of my hand, like a sister too. Maybe in the end, we would've ended up together. But now, everything had changed, had taken an overturn. Claire was alive and I wanted to be with her—she was still my wife. I just wanted to tell her how much I loved her, how much I had missed her through all those lonely years. I wanted to see her face, to see her smile, to hear her laugh... Everything about her seemed to fascinate me. Claire was an amazing woman. These past days, I had gone through every piece of memories—through photo albums, through old Christmas presents, through cards... everything! Every kind of souvenirs drew a smile on my face. I remembered all the Christmas, all the anniversaries, all the birthdays, all the parties we used to have together. Claire liked holiday parties with a few friends. Usually, they weren't huge parties, just Claire, Stella and I, maybe a few other friends but not a lot. Christmas parties with the three of us were great. Claire would make all kinds of deserts—so would Stella—and I would cook the main meal. I could honestly say that the house smelt amazing. Then, we would exchange gifts and sit down cosily with a glass of wine. Those were the days! I just couldn't wait to see her...


	2. Chapter 2

**Stella**

Today was Wednesday and I had decided to go to the hair salon for a new color. Of course, I would keep my curls! Nothing could ever convince me to get rid of them. I was a bit tired of my usual color though—the roots were starting to show. I had gone a bit darker this time with a darker shade of brown and a hint of rust. I actually liked it very much—I just hoped that everyone else would too. I couldn't wait to hear what Mac would say—if he wasn't too busy with his work, of course! The man was a working machine, he never stopped! I would tell him many times to relax and take a break, that he would kill himself working too hard but he never listened, of course. The man was so stubborn! Sometimes, he would even get me angry working that much. I didn't like to see him like this, working over time almost everyday, tired like a dog. Sometimes I would think that he slept at the lab since he was in his office so early in the morning. I had never seen anybody else so devoted to his work. He would tell me on many occasions to stop telling him what to do because I was as bad as him. I would always defend myself saying that at least I didn't sleep in my office and that I didn't look like a zombie every morning. Most of the time, I won. I liked winning with Mac on those subjects because he was always right on everything else. Mac Taylor knew everything! I always told him he was a smartass, that no one could ever fool him. He was the smartest guy I knew.

Once my hair was all dry, I thanked the hairdresser, paid her and got out the door. It was my day off today but I didn't know quite what to do—I was actually bored. I didn't know what else to do so I decided to go to the lab to work on some paperwork I needed to do for next week. I knew that Mac would give me a smart remark but I had work that needed to be done. I couldn't be blamed for that right?

I got into my vehicle and drove to the lab which wasn't too far away from the hair salon. I took my purse and entered the building. I went directly to Mac's office, even if I knew he would have a big grin on his face seeing me here today. He was sitting there as always, his eyes fixed to papers in front of him. I smiled and pushed the glass door open. To much of my surprise, he didn't react, not even lifting his head, not even a glance. I frowned and cleared my throat but still nothing. "Uh, am I disturbing any important thing?" I asked, arms folded. That's when he noticed me and tried to smile. "Oh, hey," he said. "I'm sorry, I was deep into paperwork." I smirked. "Yeah, I can see that. So, uh, you've got nothing to tell me?"

"Oh!" he finally realized. "It's your day off today. So what are you doing here then?"

"I came to work on some paperwork. It's due next week and I haven't even started yet; my fault."

"Oh, it's okay then," he replied, taking another glance at his papers. "I'll let you do that then."

A curve was drawn on the side of my mouth. "So you didn't notice anything else?" I asked.

He frowned and looked up at me. "What?"

I pointed up at my hair. "Changed the color. You like it?"

"Oh, yeah," he said. "It's beautiful. Sorry I didn't notice."

"T's okay," I replied. "Most men don't notice those kinds of things. I'm glad you like it."

He grinned and went back to his paperwork. I rolled my eyes and sighed. I at least expected having a short conversation with him. "Is there something botherin' ya?" I asked.

That's when I caught his attention. He ran his hands over his face and sighed. "Yes, actually."

I frowned and sat down on one of the visitor's chairs. "What is it, Mac? It looks serious. You're scaring me."

"Well it's a great thing you sat down," he said with a small curve on the side of his mouth. That comforted me—at least it wasn't a bad news. "Well what, Mac?" I shouted. "Don't keep me in suspense!"

"I don't know how to tell you this—you probably won't believe me. I guess I can give it a try. You know, it's been huge news for me too, of course and I had a lot of trouble believing it but..."

"Tell me!" I yelled. "You're killing me! What is it?" I was on the edge of my seat, begging him to tell me the news. He took a deep breath and looked into my green eyes. "Claire's alive."

My jaw dropped, my purse fell to the ground and my eyes widened in surprise. "Wait a minute..."

"It's okay," he said, leaning back on his chair. "I'll give you time. I know it's pretty hard to believe."

"But..." I babbled. "Y-you're telling me that Claire is alive? Like Claire, your wife? Claire Conrad-Taylor?"

He nodded. "How's that possible?"

"Well, I don't know all the details right now," he admitted. "The thing I know is that she's now in a hospital in Texas. I don't know what kind of condition she's in at the moment but I can't wait to see her."

"Yeah, you must be very happy," I said, feeling a tear rolling down my cheek. I got up from my chair and gave him a hug. "What if she doesn't remember me though?" he suddenly said. "What if she's amnesiac?"

"Oh come on Mac!" I shouted. "You're stressing yourself for nothing! I'm sure she's alright!"

"Yeah but after all these years? If she remembered me, she would've asked to see me earlier."

I wrapped my hands around his face and looked right into his beautiful blue eyes. "I'm sure there's a good explanation, Mac. You'll see she'll be all right. And you two will live happily for the rest of your life. I'm so happy for you, Mac. And I'm happy to find back a good friend."

He smiled and held me tight against him. "Could you please come with me at the hospital tomorrow then?"

My knees almost fell to the ground as he asked me that question. "Uh..." I didn't know what to answer—tomorrow seemed so fast. I still had a hard time believing it... "Well yeah, sure," I finally said without thinking.

Going with him at a hospital where his wife was would be kind of hard. He would be going through emotions a lot and I would have to be a great supporter—especially if something unexpected happened.

"So when do you want to leave tomorrow?" I asked him.

"Well we could leave around six, whadaya think?"

"Sure."

"I can't wait to see her," he said with sparkling eyes. "I've missed her so much."

"Yeah I know," I replied, still deep in my thoughts. "So you'll pick me up at my place?"

He nodded. "You better go back home and start packing. I don't know how much time we'll be there. It depends on a lot of things."

"Yeah, I understand. Well I guess I'll bring the paperwork home. I have some packing to do."

He smiled and gave me a small tap in the back. "Thanks for accepting to come with me. I really appreciate it."

"No problem," I replied. "But uh, when will you have time to pack your stuff?"

"Oh don't worry about me," he said. "I'll stay up all night. I haven't been sleeping these days anyway."

"You haven't been sleeping your entire life!" I commented. "How will you drive tomorrow?"

"I'm used to it. I'll manage, trust me."

"Yeah well you'll let me drive too," I said. "I don't want to get in an accident. I don't need that."

He chuckled. "Stop worrying and go home."

I smiled, gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and went directly to my office to grab all the paperwork I needed for tonight. I had a lot to do tonight and would have to find some time to sleep through that. I left the building and drove to my place. I entered my apartment, threw my papers on the counter and went to my bedroom to start packing. I would need a lot since I didn't know how long I would be there. I packed every possible thing; lots of clothes, shoes, all my makeup, my hair products, my jewelleries, my toothbrush, my iPod, my laptop, some snacks, everything! I also went to the bank to get some money. I was officially done with all my packing around five. Of course, I decided to go to the mall and make some shopping—it was still an occasion and I still had some place into my luggage. I also wanted to buy a little something for Claire. I knew she liked shopping at Tiffany's just like me—I remembered when we used to shop together for hours! We were actually very wild together in malls. Claire was as much a shopaholic as I was. Sometimes, when he was bored, Mac came with us and browsed around. He found it very funny to see us so happy and excited in the shops.

It was nine p.m. when I got back home. I was actually tired—my feet and my back hurt. I put the new stuff in my luggage, took a refreshing shower, put on my nightgown and went to the living room to finally start working. I had a lot of paperwork to do which discouraged me—and I found all the possible excuses not to do it. My stomach started to growl so I decided to jump into the bag of chips I had just bought—that and a few cookies. I was well aware that it wasn't the best meal to take before going to bed but hey! I needed some energy to do all that work!


	3. Chapter 3

**Mac**

"Get some sleep, get some sleep!" I kept on telling myself to fall asleep, that I needed it but it was already three a.m. and I hadn't even slept for a minute. I had stayed at the lab late and had finished packing around midnight. I knew that this would probably happen; I couldn't stop thinking about Claire. I was so happy to know that I would see her again. I kept on repeating the address in my head, the address of the hospital she was at. I kept on imagining scenarios in my head, wondering if she had changed—probably not since she always looked the same, so beautiful. That's when I suddenly thought of Reed. Reed! Should I bring him with me? Would it be too much of a shock? What if something was wrong with her? Nah, it wasn't a great idea. I would wait to see if everything was okay, bring her back to New York and then tell him. That was a better plan. I looked up at my radio-clock and noticed that fifteen minutes had already passed. I sighed and rose from my bed. Screw it, I would wake up! Nothing would get me to fall asleep anyway. I took a shower, changed into fresh and clean clothes. I had bought a new black shirt and blue jeans just a few days ago and figured I would wear them today. I got ready and then made breakfast—some bacon and eggs with a toast and my usual dark coffee. I wondered if Stella was already awake—probably not. I hoped not anyway—I didn't want her to be as tired as I was. The coffee at least woke me up a little bit. When I was finished, I washed my dishes and went to the living room to watch TV. I still had an hour and a half to wait. There wasn't really anything good to watch, unfortunately. I just wanted to get out of here and get to Texas. I just wanted to see Claire...

I suddenly heard the phone ring and quickly picked it up. Hearing Stella's voice at the other end surprised me.

"Hey," she said. "Are you ready? 'Cause I am. I had so much trouble sleeping last night."

I chuckled. "Well guess what? Same here. I haven't even slept actually. I stayed late at the lab then came here and started packing... I was done and it was midnight. I tried to sleep but couldn't stop thinking about Claire. I woke up at three fifteen."

"I woke up at three two," she replied. "I quickly ate breakfast and I'm ready to go. You come and get me?"

"Yeah, sure," I replied, a large grin on my face. "I'll be there in a few minutes."

I hung up, grabbed my luggage and got into my truck. I was finally on my way to see my Claire.

I drove to Stella's place, got in the building and knocked on the door of her apartment. I waited a few seconds before seeing the shadow under the door. Then, she finally opened. She looked gorgeous with her dark-red V-neck T-shirt and her tight black jeans. Her curly hair was loose and falling just over her shoulders. She always seemed to be attractive to me. "Well aren't we goin'?" she asked, waking me up from my daydreaming.

"Uh, yeah!" I quickly replied. "I'm sorry. Let's go." I helped her carry her luggage and placed them into my truck once outside. "You know, I've worked on that damn paperwork until one a.m. last night!" Stella said, getting into the passenger seat. "I am so tired right now my eyes are closing by themselves!"

"Yeah, join the club," I replied, rubbing my eyes. I put on my seatbelt and turned on the engine. Stella took out a granola bar from her purse as I took the road. "I thought you had eaten this morning?" I commented.

"I did," she replied. "A yogurt."

I chuckled. "Whoa, big breakfast. I ate bacon and eggs with toasts this morning. You had a coffee?"

She shook her head 'no'. "Nah and I'm starting to feel the need for caffeine."

"You want me to get you one? I wouldn't mind?"

"No, no," she replied. "You have some more important things to do."

I rolled my eyes. "Stella, making one stop to get you a coffee won't take long."

She sighed. "Whatever, do what you want."

Of course, I decided to go get her a coffee—a French Vanilla as she liked. I paid for it even though she insisted I don't. "Thank you," she said, taking a sip of it. "God it's so comforting! Hopefully it'll wake me up a lil' bit. I wouldn't want Claire to see me like this. As for you well, I think she's used to it, right?"

I smiled. "Yeah, it'll just be normal for her. Well, I hope so..."

"Oh Mac!" she yelled. "Stop being so pessimist about everything. I'm sure she's perfectly fine, the same Claire you've always known."

"How can you be so sure about that?" I asked her. "What if...?"

"What if what Mac? Stop it! It's unbelievable! You are killing me! If you don't stop all this nonsense, I'll leave."

"Oh Stella! I need you with me. I brought you with me for moral support, not to yell at me."

"I am trying to make you feel better, to encourage you, Mac. Look, Claire's all right, she still knows who you are and she still loves you. Trust me, I'm always right."

I smirked, "Yeah, that you think."

"I am, Mac. For those things, I am."

"Oh, I guess I should believe you," I sighed. I looked in front of me and realized the hundreds of cars in front of me—some people were screaming, throwing things out the windows. "Damn!" I shouted.

"Oh no!" Stella protested. "Not a traffic jam... That is just great! I told you, you should have had forgotten the coffee."

"Oh 'cause it's still my fault?" I replied.

"Well, yeah..." The grin she had on her face was so cute I couldn't help but to smile. "I guess I'm gonna make a little nap then," she said, grabbing a pillow I had thrown on the backseat. "You don't mind if I use your pillow?"

"As long as you only use it to rest your head on, no," I replied.

She rolled her eyes and placed it behind her head. "Wake me up when we arrive at the airport."

I sighed and leaned back on my seat, waiting for the traffic to clear up. I turned on the radio—not too loud to let Stella sleep—and tried to find some good tune. In a matter of seconds, Stella fell asleep. The poor lady was so tired. I stared at her for a few minutes; even though she was tired, she looked amazing. I liked the sexy outfit she had decided to wear today. I scanned her from head to toe, pausing once to take a quick glance at her cleavage. Then I turned back, telling myself I couldn't do this. I enjoyed looking at her though; she was so beautiful. She reminded of Claire actually; of course, Reed had thought she was her. Stella had literally been my hope all these years, my shoulder to lean on and I appreciated her very much.

I was discouraged when I realized that the traffic wasn't even moving after fifteen minutes. I just hoped we weren't going to miss our flight…


	4. Chapter 4

**Stella**

"Come on, Stella, we're here." Mac's voice woke me up from my nap. "Whoa, what time is it?" I asked, seeing him getting the luggage out of the vehicle. "It seems like I've been sleeping for hours."

"It took forty-five minutes before we could get outta there," he answered. "At least we didn't miss our flight."

"Yeah… oh my God I would've felt so bad. It was my fault that we were stuck in all that traffic. I'm still sorry."

"Look, I decided to go get you a coffee," he said, looking up at me from outside his truck. "You comin' now?"

"Yeah, yeah." I jumped out of the truck and grabbed my luggage. I followed Mac through the airport and a few minutes later, we got into our airplane. "Okay so where are we sitting?" I asked, looking around.

"Here," Mac said, showing me a place on the left, near the windows. "I hope you're not scared of flying."

"Ah, just a little bit," I admitted. "I get a bit dizzy and sick but most of the time, I'm capable of holding everything back." I smirked and sat down on the seat closer to the window. Mac chuckled and placed our luggage on the overhead shelf. Then he sat down next to me and waited for the plane to take off.

"What about you?" I suddenly asked. "Do you get sick when you fly?"

He shook his head 'no'. "No. I don't get sick at all, actually."

"Of course," I said, leaning back on my seat. "Mac Taylor can take everything. You ain't scared of nothin' are ya?"

He shrugged. "I can't think of anything. Well maybe three things at the moment; losing Claire again, losing my job or losing you."

I smiled at his response and took his hand into mine. "You don't have to worry about the last thing. You won't lose me, Mac. You seriously think you could get rid of me that easily?"

We both laughed and that's when the plane took off. "There you go," I said, holding on my seat. "Protect yourself in case I throw up on ya."

"Wow, that's great," he said. "Can I do something to comfort you?"

I smiled and only thought of one thing. But of course, that, I couldn't tell him. "Maybe you could actually."

He looked into my eyes and knew I wouldn't specify my answer. I think he somehow knew what I meant. Anyway, we both knew something like this wouldn't happen now. The love he had for his wife was stronger than anything else. And now that she was back in the picture, I certainly couldn't make any move—that would be totally immoral. I have to admit I had always been drawn towards Mac. On many, many nights I had dreamt about him, thinking maybe one day, it would happen. I had had impure thoughts, yes, and a few erotic dreams, I couldn't deny that. But to me, Mac remained a married man and I just couldn't get in a relationship with him even if I wanted to more than anything else in the whole wide world. It had actually been hard to keep my hands off him when we were in Greece. Such a beautiful, romantic country… it would've been perfect. We were just the two of us, nothing and no one to disturb us. Some nights, I could almost feel him with me, feel his breath against my cheeks, his hands caressing my body. The worst thing in that was that I knew damn well that it was a simple illusion, that something like that couldn't possibly happen. How many nights I had dreamt of making passionate love to him, of enjoying every inch of him... it would be so great. How many times I had stopped myself from entering the men's locker room while he was there. How many times I had imagined him under his clothes, wondering if he was as amazing as I thought he was. Just thinking about it made me want to jump on him. My heart started to race in my chest, the sweat started to run down my back as those sexual thoughts crossed my mind once again. Looking at him would only worsen the situation so I couldn't turn back. Suddenly, I felt his hand on my thigh—my breath got stuck in my throat, my pupils expanded in the middle of my green eyes. God this man knew how to arouse me...

"Do you fell better?" he suddenly asked me.

"Y-yeah," I breathed, still looking out the window. It took me everything not to drag him to the nearest bathroom and fulfilling my longing needs. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on something else. I couldn't lose control here, now, this was way too important for him. I couldn't ruin something that beautiful because I was too self-centered. I satisfied myself with thoughts and finally gained back my sanity.

"You okay?" Mac finally asked me. "The biggest part passed."

I looked at him and tried to smile. "Yeah, I know. Thanks." The urge had passed but the desire was still there, deep inside of me. Mac was an irresistible man and it seems like I just couldn't stop thinking about him.

He was such a great person... God, sometimes I wished I would've acted earlier! Maybe we could be together now... But then again, maybe our relationship would be broken and that was the worst thing that could ever happen to me! Losing Mac would be losing my own self. I just couldn't live without him. He was too important.

I wonder if we would've been together, how he would've reacted to the reappearance of his wife.

I looked back at him and enjoyed my view for a few seconds, until he realized I was staring at him.

"What's wrong with you?" he asked with a curve on the side of his mouth. "Why're ya starin' at me?"

I shrugged. "I think I have the right to admire a good-looking man. Especially when he's sitting right next to me."

He blushed and smirked, not knowing what to respond. I started to laugh. "Hey, why do you feel so embarrassed? I tried to give you a compliment, accept it and be proud of yourself!"

"Well," he babbled. "Thanks."

"No problem! Claire will be glad to see you haven't changed a bit. You're still as hot as you were at those crazy Christmas parties at your house."

He chuckled, remembering the good memories. "Yeah, those parties were great. You and Claire were so alike."

I grinned and looked down at my nails. "Yeah, we were great friends too. She was an amazing woman."

"Yeah," he replied. "And I hope she hasn't changed either."

"Well it's possible that she's changed a little bit but don't be afraid. After all those years, things change. You have changed, interiorly. Not a lot, just a little bit. But I think that what you liked in her is still there. I'm sure."

"I just want her to be the Claire she's always been to me. I want her to still love me."

I bit my bottom lip and wrapped my arms around his shoulders. "You'll see she'll still remember you and love you. If she doesn't remember you, well, she'll just fall in love all over again, simple as that. I don't know one woman who wouldn't fall in love with you, Mac Taylor. You're the greatest man I know."

"Does that mean you loved me some time in your life?" he asked with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

I could honestly say he had shut me up; what was I supposed to reply to that? "Uh, well... I don't know."

"You don't need to be shy with me, Stel. I can say I loved you."

'Loved' me? Did that mean that now, he didn't love me anymore? "What do you mean? I love you Mac, I really do. You're a great friend and everything—not to mention that you're very attractive. Yes, you're someone great. I can honestly say I don't know what I would do without you. You're my best friend, my confident."

"Did you ever love me more than a friend, I mean?" Damn! The hard question again!

"Well... I don't know! You're so complicated!"

"No, I'm not. You're the one making it complicated."

"Mac!" I shouted. "What the hell do you mean? Yes, I love you, Mac, I fuckin' love you!"

That's when I noticed everyone's gaze fixed on me and realized what I had just said. God I was stupid!

He started to laugh and looked back at me. "I think you've made your point. Now everyone in here's gonna think you've made the big declaration."

I frowned and gave him a tap on his arm. "Oh, shut up! If your plan was to embarrass me, well, I can say you've done one damn good job."

"Yes, I think I did."

"What was your point anyway in all this?"

"I just wanted to know. You told me you didn't know any woman who wouldn't fall in love with me. That means you already have."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, Mac... maybe I did, the first time I saw you but after that, I learned to know you and you became my best friend, so did your wife, and it just became friendship I guess."

"So you had a crush on me?" he asked with a small curve on the side of his mouth.

"Well, yeah, I guess," I babbled. "Isn't it like this for everyone? You meet someone new, you think he's the best, then you realize you both have your own lives and that really, there isn't truly anything going on between you and that person. What about you? You said you've loved me."

"Well yeah," he replied, uneasy. "I guess you just reminded me of Claire and..."

"And what?"

"Well I'm not telling you I would've cheated on my wife or anything, it was just that kind of attraction you know? That silly attraction you have for someone who resembles someone you already love."

"Yeah, I guess." It took me a few minutes to realize he had actually admitted he had once loved me. That was great, right? "How long did that last?" I couldn't help but to ask.

He shrugged. "A few months, I guess. Maybe a year, I don't know. What about you?"

I made the same gesture. "I guess I can say quite a long time. Did Claire ever notice anything?"

"Well she knew we were great friends and we were very alike but I don't think she actually noticed something to be worried about. She knew I was faithful and I would not have cheated on her. And she trusted you too."

I smiled. "Good. I want people to have trust in me."

"Well she did. She even told me..." He stopped promptly, leaving his words unsaid.

"What did she tell you?" I asked with a frown on my face.

"Oh, nothing," he said with a sigh. "It's not important."

I didn't bother him, I just forgot about it. If he didn't want to tell me, it was his choice. Maybe it was better that way. "So let's change the subject!" I finally said. "This conversation has been a little awkward, I have to admit."

"It's nothing," he said. "We're friends, what can it do to tell each other those kinda things?"

"It can break it," I quickly replied.

"How's that?" he asked.

"One feeling a certain way and the other, not feeling the same way at all. One finds the courage to tell the truth than the other deserts her and she's left alone for the rest of her life, losing both a fantasy and a good friend."

"You're speaking as if it has already happened to you," he commented.

"It hasn't," I replied.

"You were talking of the one rejected as a woman," he said. "Couldn't it be the whole way around?"

"Yes, of course," I quickly answered. "I was just saying... it could be like this on one side or the other. In the end, both persons are broken. Don't you think?"

He shrugged. "Maybe. Anyway, don't be afraid of sharing anything with me, Stella. I'll never reject you."

I smiled. "Thanks. I know you're a good friend and I really appreciate that."

"Now, have you ever thought of me in a sexual way?"

My eyes widened and I blushed. "What?" I almost yelled.

He started to laugh at my reaction. "Are you fuckin' crazy, Mac Taylor? You dare asking me this? This is totally crazy and I'm not answering this one."

"What, you've got something to hide?" he asked with a smirk.

"No!" I quickly replied. "It's just a dumb question and I refuse to answer it. God, you're not like this usually, what's wrong with you? Is the fact of seeing your wife again makes you that way?"

He chuckled. "I guess it's just the stress. And your reactions are pretty priceless too..."

"Yeah, yeah, must be... have you ever thought of me in a sexual way... you are sick, Mac!"

"Hey, it's a simple question like any other."

"Yeah, really simple..." I said with an eye roll. "How about you? Have you ever thought of me in a sexual way?"

He frowned. "Yeah, actually."

My jaw dropped to the floor and then I realized he was kidding me. "Oh Mac! You are disturbed, really disturbed. We are friends, we aren't supposed to talk about things like this, it is just sick."

"What?" he said, looking back at me. "There isn't anything wrong with that."

"Yes, when you're married especially. Thinking of fucking me when you have a wife is pretty disturbing."

"Oh, Stel, get over it!" he said. "I was just joking."

"Okay, okay. I mean, I can think about things like that but you can't. You've already got somebody in your life."

He shook his head in disbelief. "You're one special case, Stella Bonasera. It's true though that I've noticed you checking my ass on many occasions when you thought I wasn't aware."

"Oh Mac Taylor! I have never checked out your ass, ever!"

"Liar," he said, playing with the watch around his left wrist.

"Where have you taken this dirty idea?" I asked him.

"Hey, you were the one staring, I just noticed."

"Yeah right and you think I wasn't aware either when you were looking down my cleavage almost every day?"

"That is not true," he denied.

"Yeah, yeah, when it comes to you, it's not true, of course. Mac Taylor, the perfect human being."

"Of course," he said. "I wouldn't do something like that. I'm decent."

"That is pure bullshit and you know it."

"Okay, I might've caught a few glimpses, and?" he finally admitted. "It's not my fault if you're wearing revealing tops."

"Oh because it's my fault again now? You're unbelievable, Mac!"

"You're probably wearing them just so I can notice you more."

"Mac!"

"That and your tight pants that show greatly your pleasant figure..."

"Mac! Stop it! You're starting to scare me! Are you turning into some kind of pervert of somethin'?"

He laughed again. "God, it's so easy to make you uncomfortable..."

"From now on, I'll wear sweaters and track pants so I wouldn't be blamed for any sort of self-selling."

"Self-selling?" he repeated with a frown. "That's a good one."

"You know it's the most bizarre, odd, scary and awkward sex-talk I've ever had..."

He chuckled. "It's actually the funniest I've had..."

"Yeah," I replied with a grin. "Me too. It just feels weird talking about sex with you. We've never had that kind of talk before."

"Hey, the flight's gonna be long so we better keep ourselves entertained."

"Yeah, yeah, great excuse, oversexed beast..."

"So uh, tell me, Stella... if you had one last person on Earth you could get lucky with, who would it be?"

I frowned and sighed. "Stupid question, not answering." Of course, I couldn't give him my answer...

"Oh come on, Stella, don't be shy with me."

"I am not shy, I'm just not answering questions like this. It's useless..."

"Don't try to tell me you have nobody in mind."

"Actually, I don't," I said, folding my arms across my chest. "Not interested in anyone at the moment." Anyone except for him... "Okay, it's my turn to ask the sick question; craziest place you've ever done it?"

He took a moment to think and came up with an answer. "That would have to be in a photo booth."

I started to laugh. "You? Mac Taylor? Having sex in a photo booth? You have to be kidding me!"

"No, actually, I'm not. It was on a vacation Claire and I had taken... we had spent two weeks in Vegas. Of course, all the alcohol hadn't helped... It was spontaneous but pretty cool actually."

I laughed. "So how 'bout you?" he asked. "I answered, now it's your turn."

"Oh, my sex life hasn't been really exciting. The good old bed would have to be to answer."

He smirked. "Seriously?"

I nodded. "No crazy attempts. Not like you... But I've got to admit the photo booth thing is pretty hot."

"Yes, it was indeed."


	5. Chapter 5

**Mac**

Stella had decided to take a small nap not to be too tired when we would arrive in Texas. I stared at her for a pretty long time; she looked so comfortable, lost in her world. Then, she finally woke up, yawned and stretched out. "Hey, were you watching me sleeping?" she said, a smile across her face.

I smiled back. "Yeah, actually. You're pretty beautiful when you sleep."

"Really?" she said, leaning her head against my chest and wrapping her arm around me. "Well thank you."

I smiled and held her against me. "I'm a bit cold," she suddenly croaked, burying her face into my neck.

"Could you please warm me up?"

Warm her up? "Uh, okay..." I babbled, fondling her back. I heard a few moans coming out of her mouth as I massaged her. And then, in a matter of seconds, she fell back sleep, in my arms. I didn't know what to do; if I should stay in that awkward but pleasant position or just push her away a little bit. I looked down at her; her eyes were closed and her chest was moving at the beat of her respiration. From where I was, I could see right down her cleavage. I caught a glimpse and then looked away, remembering Claire. Sometimes, it could be so hard to resist to Stella... I suddenly felt her hand moving down from my chest to my stomach. I felt a shiver striking through me. I'm sure she didn't mean to do it because she was deep in her sleep but it made me really uncomfortable. My heart started to beat in my chest and it was as if something was stuck in my throat—it wasn't a good sign. Then, she moved a little bit down again. "Stella!" I almost shouted. "Eh, what? Oh!" she said, waking up. "Oh, uh, I-I'm sorry, I-I didn't want to... I... damn! I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I said, scooting into my seat.

"Well I didn't want to touch you... there... I apologize."

"It's not your fault, you were sleeping."

"Oh I feel like such a fool right now! I am so sorry."

"Don't feel bad, you were sleeping." Good thing I hadn't 'reacted' to her move. Whoa, how embarrassing that would have been! I didn't want her to think I was attracted to her, especially sexually. Well it's true that anyone would react so if it happened to him. Anyone would especially with Stella...

There was a moment of awkward silence between us now. She was looking in front of herself, thinking, feeling like a fool and I was looking down at my hands, wondering how she felt.

"I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable," she suddenly said in almost a whisper.

"No, it's okay, I told you. Forget about it."

"Did I make you, uh...?"

"Make me what?" I asked innocently.

"Well you know..."

"No!" I quickly answered.

"Okay, good," she said with a sigh of relief. "Because I would've felt even worst."

"Don't worry about it," I said again.

* * *

New chapter coming soon. Please tell me what you think. :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Stella**

We arrived in Texas after what seemed like years. I was so tired of being on this airplane—and I still felt like a fool for having touched Mac inappropriately. But it wasn't like it was my fault; I was completely asleep, unaware of what was going on around me. We had stayed silent most of the time, almost afraid of each other. I was stupid.

We got out the plane and went directly to the hotel we would be staying in for God knows how much time. It seemed like more the hours passed, the more anxious I got. The idea of seeing Claire again was almost scary in some way. It had been such a long time... I had gotten through the rough times of losing a good friend, now I was being told she was still alive after all those years... I couldn't even imagine how Mac had felt when he had learned the news.

We both went to our rooms which were placed one in front of the other. I liked it that way—I felt safe with Mac close to me.

I placed a few things here and there, the most important and then crossed the hallway to Mac's bedroom.

"So," I said, rubbing my hands together. "When are we going to see her?"

He took a deep breath and sat down on the bed. "Whoa, I just can't believe it Stel. I can't believe I'm going to see my wife soon."

I smirked and gave him a light tap in the back. "Stop saying you don't believe it and go see her."

He grinned back. "Yeah, I think you're right."

He got up and left his room, me walking behind him. I had my purse with me in which I had Claire's gift. I didn't know in what condition she was in but if she was awake and alert, I would give it to her. God I wish she was okay. Mac would be totally broken if it was not the case. I didn't want to see him that way; it would sadden me even more. I hated seeing Mac sad, it broke my heart completely.

We took a cab to get to the hospital. Mac gave the address to the driver and we both waited patiently in the backseat without saying a word. We were both scared and worried but at the same time, extremely happy.

I looked out the window, admiring the many beautiful aspects of Texas. And to much of my surprise, we were already arrived at the hospital where Claire was.

We both thanked the driver and got out the cab, Mac quickly paying him. We looked like robots entering the building, emotionless. It didn't show in our faces but we were tremendously stressed. I could feel the sweat in the palm of my hands and falling down my spine. I made a small prayer, wishing everything would be all right and that's when we saw a nurse. According to her nametag, she was Cassandra. "I'm Cassandra Hale," she said in a soft tone. "Can I do something for you?"

"Yes," Mac said in almost a whisper. "I would like to see my wife; Claire Conrad-Taylor."

"Oh, you are Mac Taylor," she said with a smile. "It'll be my pleasure to get you to her room."

Mac quickly glanced at me and took my hand which he held tightly. "You're ready?"

I looked into his beautiful blue eyes and nodded. I just hoped my prayer had been listened to...


	7. Chapter 7

**Claire**

Maybe they had been shocked but I was even more. I had been taken care of beautifully for all those years but still, nothing felt like having Mac taking care of me. Mac was my everything and had always been. Gosh I was so happy to see—to hear—him. Too bad I couldn't speak to him, tell him how excited I was to have him here with me. If I could, only for a minute tell him how much I loved him. If only I could express my gratitude that he had come after all. I had thought maybe he would be scared, maybe he wouldn't want to see me after all those years. It was probably extremely hard for him right now; especially that he was seeing me in such a state. I wish I could just be awake, just for him, for his own sake. The man could be so sensitive, especially when it came to people he loved.

Anyway, just hearing his velvet voice comforted me more than anything. The touch of his soft skin against mine, the feeling of his warm breath against my cheeks, my lips. Still through his beautiful voice I could hear the cries of his shattered heart. _"Claire, if only you could hear me, if only you knew how much I love you..." _If only he knew I heard him even though I seemed so lifeless. I could hear every single word so clearly. It felt so great to hear someone else's voice. Since the tragedy, I had gotten accustomed to only the sound of my delicate respiration, to the beating of my frail heart. Of course, I had Marcos who had taken care of me but that was different. I was so happy to be with my husband, finally.

That's when I suddenly heard another familiar voice—this one of a woman. _"I'm sure she can hear you." _There was the smart lady, the woman who had been there for me and Mac our entire lives. The beautiful Stella Bonasera.

God I was happy she was still in my husband's life. At least, he still had her. She was a wonderful lady, an excellent friend and I was so grateful she had crossed me and Mac's path. She had faith in my husband and she believed in him, just like I did. She had been like his second wife; she supported him as much as I did. I was grateful for that and I was happy she hadn't let him down. I can still remember when I told him if something would ever happen to me, that I would like him to think about Stella since she was such a wonderful, kind person. Of course, he wasn't interested in that time. He had told me he would stay alone and obviously, he had kept his words. I guess maybe subconsciously he knew I wasn't dead. I just hoped that I would wake up soon so that we could start all over again. I missed him terribly.

Sometimes I would dream about the wonderful life we could have together if I would wake up. I dream about the holidays we could have, just like we had many years ago. Invite our friends over and have a party... Unfortunately, I don't think that would ever happen. I don't know why but I had a feeling I wasn't going to wake up. Even if I wasn't awake, I had good days and bad days. Sometimes I was a bit more alert in my mind than others. Some days,_ I_ wouldn't even know if I was still alive. I just wished I could have had avoided it all... I would still have a life today...


	8. Chapter 8

**Mac**

Seeing her like this completely shattered me into pieces. Attached to all sorts of thing, making her live yet for what really? She seemed so deep in her sleep, so unaware of the outside world. If only she could hear my voice, if only she knew I was here with her... "I love you, baby," I said, stroking her hair. She looked just the same, as pretty as she was the last day I had seen her. The only thing I missed was her beautiful eyes.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked behind me; it was Stella. "I know she can hear you, Mac," she said. "Talk to her. I'm sure she's dying to hear your voice."

I sighed and leaned my head against her stomach. Her respiration was so slow, barely noticeable. A tear ran down my cheek as I thought of all the good memories we had had together. It felt as if I was going through a second mourning. "I love you, Claire."

Stella fondled my back and tried to comfort me even though she was sad too.

"Do you think she will wake up, Stel?" I asked her.

It took a moment for her to respond. "Maybe. You never know. Don't lose all you hope, Mac. You've got to stay strong."

"Stay strong..." I repeated. "How can I be?"

She bit her bottom lip and leaned her head against my shoulder. "It's hard for me too, Mac."

"She's been like this for ten years, Stella. Do you really think she could wake up again?"

"Oh, Mac... you don't know how much I would like her to wake up. You don't know how much I would like it to be me lying there instead of her. It's killing me to see you both suffering..."

"Don't talk like this Stella. It's nobody's fault what happened."

"It's not your fault either and look what you're going through. You so don't deserve this."

"I need you too, Stella. Just be there for me okay? Like you've always been..."

"I'll never let you down Mac. I will always, _always_, be there for you okay?"

I nodded and held her hand tightly. At least I had brought her with me. She had the ability to clam me down, to comfort me.

I got up and sat on an armchair near the bed. Stella sat on the armrest, fondling my back and telling me everything was going to be fine. I sighed and buried my face in my hands. What a day...

"You wanna stay here tonight?" Stella asked in a soft tone.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I'm so discouraged right now, Stella..."

"I know, I know," she said, wrapping her arms around my shoulders. "If only I could do something to make it all better..."

"Unfortunately, you can't."

"I know."

She sniffled and brushed her soft lips against my cheek. I could feel the dampness of her cheeks against my face, a mix of my tears and hers. "Oh God, Stella, I don't know what I'm gonna do... I've been through this once but I don't think I'll be able to get through it twice. It hurts so badly."

"I know, Mac, I know." She was running out of words, though I couldn't stop talking. It was as if, if I stopped, I would sink deep into that state of depression again. I didn't want that.

A man's voice was what separated us, making us both look up. "You must be M. Taylor?"

I nodded and rose from my chair. "Yeah, it's me. W-who are you?"

"I'm Marcos Diantini," he replied, shaking my hand. "I've been taking care of your wife for the last ten years."

A feeling of jealousy suddenly hit me—this man had been spending the last ten years with my wife while I had been in mourning, in a state of total depression. I had felt pain, loneliness, gone through complete insanity while he had been with her the whole time!

"You must be angry at me now for not having told you that your wife was still alive after all those years," the man said. "Well I am sorry, truly but the thing is that I never knew about you before the last months."

"How come? And how the hell did she land in Texas?"

"I'll explain this all to you. But before, do you want something drink?"

"B..."

"We'll have coffee, thanks," Stella interrupted me.

The man nodded and left the room. I turned back to look at Stella, bewildered. "What the hell is this?"

She shrugged and placed a hand on my shoulder—she didn't want me to be angry.

We both sat down again and waited for the man to reappear. I've got to admit, he looked professional. I just hoped he hadn't taken advantage of my wife in any way...

He came back a few minutes later with coffee for everyone and sat in front of us.

The thing that struck me the most was that this room didn't look like a hospital room at all—it in fact looked like a real bedroom with couches, decorations, nice curtains, tables, beautiful flowers...

The man took a sip of his drink and sighed. "I guess I'll just start with the beginning of the story." He paused and proceeded. "I was walking in the streets of New York City the day of the tragedy. I can still remember the smell, see the flames, the smoke, hear people screaming everywhere. It was the real scene of hell, of complete injustice. I can still remember the look in everyone's eyes, feel the tension, the dark atmosphere surrounding the city. I just couldn't imagine it. That's when I saw a woman running in my direction; golden long curls, beautiful hazel eyes... It was an angel, saved miraculously. I couldn't believe it." He stopped again, brushed away a falling tear with the back of his hand and continued his story. "She had a scar on the side of her head which was pretty evident. She had bloody hands too but I don't think it was her blood. Anyway, she begged me to take her out of there so I did. I brought her in my van and started to drive without any destination in mind. I asked her where she wanted me to bring her but she was so scared she didn't answer me. She was shaking—I hadn't seen anyone shaking so much in my entire life. She kept on saying she wanted to go home but every time I asked her where her home was, she would scream. So I waited, thinking she just needed a moment to let it all out. She finally stopped after a few minutes. So I tried to get some information again. But she didn't answer me. She stayed mute and gently leaned back in her seat. She had passed out."

"So you're sayin' that she just randomly passed out like that, out of the blue?" I said, a frown on my face.

"She had a big scar on her head, Mister. I think something happened to her inside that building."

"So what happened afterwards?" Stella asked, feeling the tension between us.

"Well of course, I bought her to the hospital immediately."

"And how did she get here?" I asked.

"After a couple of years, they said they couldn't keep her in the hospital anymore. So I decided to leave my apartment in New York and move back in my hometown—and bring her with me. I cared immensely about your wife, Mister Taylor. I tried making some research to find her family but didn't find anything."

"How's that possible..."

"It is, Sir. And I'm sincerely sorry I couldn't find you any sooner."

"Why did you care so much about her anyway?" I asked. "You didn't even know her, you only met her randomly on the street, I mean..."

"I know it's hard to understand, Sir but that's exactly what happened. I don't know why but your wife became a big importance in my life."

I shook my head in disbelief. How could he care so much about someone he didn't even know?

"Anyway, I continued my research and finally came across your name. I just want you to know Mister Taylor that I have taken good care of your wife during those years. She's been treated like a queen."

"I hope so," I said. "She doesn't deserve any less."

"Well I'm glad you understand," the man replied, standing up. "Now I'm going to leave you alone with your wife."

He left the room, leaving us alone in the room with Claire.

"Well he looks like a fine guy," Stella commented.

"Maybe but I still find him suspicious. And I don't buy his story completely."

"Completely," Stella repeated. "At least you buy a little bit of it."

I tried to smile at that. "Anyway, the important thing is that I'm with her now."

The hours passed and it was getting darker and darker outside. My eyes were starting to close by themselves—I just couldn't win the battle against my eyelids. "You tired, honey," Stella said, lying down on the couch. She stretched her long figure, letting a moan escape her mouth. Her curls brushed the side of her beautiful face to fall back against a small red pillow. "You can go back to the hotel, y'know," I said.

"No," she replied between two yawns. "T's okay."

"You sure? I can go with you and come back here, I really don't mind, Stel."

"No, t's okay," she repeated closing her emerald eyes. "I'll stay here with ya."

I leaned back in my chair, trying to get comfortable though it didn't work at all. My lower back hurt and my legs were numb.

"Ya can sleep next to me," Stella suddenly said. "I'm sure this chair's not as comfortable as this couch."

The idea of sleeping next to her scared me. Of course, it was tempting but I didn't trust myself. I was still a man inside, a man with desires and needs. "Nah, I'll stay here," I replied. "Thanks."

"Oh, come on, Mac," she insisted. "We're friends, we can share a couch. What's wrong with it?"

She moved slightly, letting me some place. "C'mon, I won't rape you, don't worry."

I chuckled at that and sighed. I finally rose from my chair and joined her on the couch. "You seriously think that we're gonna be more comfortable here?" I said with a smirk on my face. "I don't even know if there's enough place for the two of us."

"There will be, just a sec." She moved again and held me close to her.

"I don't want to squish you," I said, noticing she was tightly stuck between me and the couch.

"Don't worry, just go to sleep." She wrapped her arm around me and leaned her head against my shoulder. "Goodnight."

I smiled. "Goodnight, Stel."


	9. Chapter 9

**Stella**

It was one a.m. when I woke up, unable to fall back asleep. Mac was sleeping—which surprised me very much. Mac never slept. His chest was slowly rising as he breathed and I could hear him snore. I chuckled silently and watched him sleep for a few minutes. He finally seemed so at peace, so comfortable, so calm. I was sure he wouldn't sleep due to everything that had happened today. I guess some comfort on my part had helped him.

I looked up to see if any movements were done by Claire—unfortunately, she was still motionless. The poor woman... she so didn't deserve that kind of bad luck. I lay back down and carefully wrapped my arm around Mac—I was so cold, maybe some human warmth would warm me up. That's when he groaned and turned on his other side to face me. Gladly, I hadn't waked him up. I slid down on the couch and looked at him. He was so handsome...

It was so sad Claire couldn't see him, see how beautifully he had aged. She would be so proud of him to see that he was still as successful as he was the last time she saw him—even more successful now.

She had always been so proud of her husband. Just by the look in her eyes, the way she looked at him with that smile that couldn't be erased from her soft face. It was obvious she was totally in love with Mac.

I admired the man myself—I mean, who wouldn't? Mac was handsome, smart, the kindest person on Earth... He was perfect. He would do anything to protect the ones he loved and that was really beautiful.

"Ya watchin' me sleep?" His voice woke me up from my daydreaming. I smiled and responded.

"Yes, actually. You look pretty handsome when you sleep."

We both exchanged a smile. "Actually, you look great all the time."

He sat up and looked towards Claire's bed—she was still inert. "I dreamt she had wakened up," he said.

"Maybe that's because she will," I said. "Soon."

"You really think so?"

I shrugged. "Maybe, yes, now that you're here. Maybe that's what she was waiting for."

He tried to smile. "Thanks for your support. You know, it would be so hard for me if you weren't here."

"No problem, honey," I said, fondling his back. "I'll always be there for you, you can count on me."

We lay back down and cuddled on the couch since there wasn't much space. "I'm so cold," I said, shaking.

"Come here," he said, pulling me closer to him. "Too bad I didn't ask for a blanket earlier."

"Yeah, I think I'm gonna freeze to death."

"Nothing's better than human warmth," he said, wrapping his arm around me. I smiled and buried my face into the crook of his neck. God, it felt so good to be so close to him, I felt so safe. I needed comfort as much as he did—though he needed a bit more, obviously.

"Try to sleep, honey," he whispered through my curls.

A huge grin was drawn on my face as the last word escaped his mouth. It was the first time he called me a sweet name...

* * *

There you go, hope you liked the small chapter! Next one coming soon. Reviews are always appreciated :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Mac**

We woke up the next morning, entangled. My arm was wrapped around her waist and her leg was wrapped around my hips. "Still cold?" I asked with a smirk.

Her emerald eyes opened and she chuckled. "Nah, fine now."

I ran my hand on her forehead and admired her beauty. "I think we should go back to our hotel rooms now to get ready," she said. "We'll come back here as soon as possible."

I nodded and got up from the couch; Claire was still inert on the bed, unfortunately.

"I hope you spent a great night," we suddenly heard Marcos say. "I know it's not the most comfortable place but..."

"No, we were fine," I replied. "Now we're going back to our hotel to get ready and everything. We'll be back soon."

"I'll be waiting."

I tried to smile and left the room, Stella behind me.

"Have you finally decided to trust the man?" she asked me.

I nodded. "I guess. He still took care of my wife for all these years. I should be grateful, right?"

"Absolutely."

We went to our hotel room to get ready for the day ahead of us. I took a hot shower, changed into fresh clothes and tried to relax. I felt so tense, so stressed with all that was happening to me. I just hoped Stella was right and that Claire was going to wake up soon. I wouldn't be capable of leaving the state knowing that she would be there alone, that I hadn't had the chance to talk to her.

I took a quick glance at myself in the mirror of my small bathroom and placed my hair. I looked so tired—though I looked like this almost everyday.

I sighed and went to Stella's room to see if she was ready. I knocked and she told me I could come in. But to much of my surprise, she was standing there in her lacy underwear, slowly getting dressed. I took a moment to admire her great figure, her long legs and flat stomach. God, she looked gorgeous. She was a real Greek Goddess.

When she was about to turn around to look at me, I quickly turned back, as if I wasn't looking at her.

"Okay, I'm ready," she said, once all dressed up. "Let's go."

I shook the impure thoughts away from my mind and followed her outside. All the way back to the hospital, I couldn't seem to stop seeing her in her hotel room, half naked. Why the hell had she done that? Stella was more careful than that habitually. I guess it was just the rush...

Once back at the hospital, we decided to buy some snacks out the vending machines and eat that in Claire's room. We were both hungry but didn't really feel like eating so some light snacks would be just perfect.

"You look tired, honey," Stella suddenly said, running her hand up and down my back. "Whoa and you're so tense... You want me to massage you a little bit?" Not even waiting for an answer, she sat down behind me and started massaging my neck. I moaned at the great feeling—she really knew how to make me feel better. Then she gently lifted my shirt and continued her job. I closed my eyes and focused on comforting gesture.

"Does that help you?" she suddenly asked.

I nodded. "Immensely. Thank You."

"No problem," she replied as she pressed harder and harder into my nape. "That's what we do right? We take care of each other?"

I smiled. "Yeah..."


	11. Chapter 11

**Stella **

Seeing him almost shirtless felt pleasantly awkward. Running my fingers along his back, feeling his muscles move under my hands and knowing that I was doing him some good seemed to ease the tension within myself. I almost felt guilty feeling so good while Claire couldn't even enjoy Mac's presence. I sighed and softly traced with my fingers the line in his back. He breathed in, breathed out—he seemed to be more relax already. I couldn't help but to wonder if he was feeling the same way as I did. It took me everything to stay cool and not do something stupid. Mac was so desirable and this seemed like such a great occasion...

This hospital seemed so empty, so depressing as nothing seemed to move, nothing seemed alive. I looked at Claire who seemed as lifeless as she was before. I tried to hold back my tears—I had to stay strong for Mac.

Inside I wished I could be the one unconscious instead of Claire. I could be happy to know that they were together and wouldn't have to be dealing with those emotion issues. I was attached to Mac more than anyone could ever know. I loved him like a wife, not only a friend. My love for him was unconditional and it seemed like no matter what he would do, I would still love him. Some would think it was just some innocent attraction but that was false. It was more than just a simple fantasy, it was real love, real passion and desire. I _loved_ Mac Taylor.

I've got to admit that letting him in my room while I was getting dressed was all planned. I felt horrible at the moment since it wasn't really the right time to do something like this but I hadn't been capable to stop myself.

After a moment, I stopped massaging him and lay down on the couch. Mac was beside Claire's bed, holding her hand. It was such a sad scene that a few tears escaped from the corners of my green eyes.

"Come on Claire, wake up, honey," Mac said, looking at her with streaming eyes. "Wake up for me, sweetheart..."

Losing all hope, he started to cry softly. That's when I rose from my seat and went at his side. I wrapped my arms around him and held him right against me. "It's okay, Mac. I'm here."

"She won't wake up, Stella I know it."

"Don't lose all your hope, Mac."

"How can I do that when she won't even move, won't even squeeze my hand?"

I stayed mute and closed my eyes, allowing the tears to roll down my cheeks. "We're in this together."

"I don't want to lose her all over again, Stella."

"She'll still be in your mind, no matter what happens."

"I won't be able to get through it."

"Don't expect the worst case scenario, Mac."

"It's better to do that than to expect a miracle and be broken in the end."

"Mac..." I ran out of comforting words; I guess I just couldn't give him more hope anymore.

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my curls. "No matter what happens, Stella, don't leave me. Cause if I lose both of you, I'll go insane."

"Don't worry about that, Mac. You know not to worry about that..."


	12. Chapter 12

**The song at the end of the chapter is called **_**Bed of Roses**_** by Bon Jovi. Enjoy!**

**Mac**

The clock was ticking on the wall and the sound was starting to drive me insane. I had heard it all day, I was more than tired of hearing it. Every time, it seemed as if it was pounding in my ears, depressing me more than ever. It seemed like every second that passed was a second of my life with Claire lost. I hated that, it scared me.

"I think we should get out of here," I suddenly said. "Yeah, it's time to get out."

Stella frowned. "What?"

"I just need air, some other atmosphere than this. It's too depressing, it's driving me insane. Sitting here waiting for a miracle to happen makes me crazy."

"You sure, Mac? 'Cause we can..."

"No, Stella, I wanna get out. Let's go."

Stella followed me, unsure of what was going on. "Why are you like this?" she asked me

."Like what? I just want to get out for a moment, what's wrong with that?"

She shrugged, bewildered. "Where are we going then? It's nine o'clock."

I stopped promptly and took a moment to think. "Dancing. We're gonna go dancing."

Stella burst into laugh. "Pardon? Dance? Where the hell did you get that sudden idea? It's so spontaneous, it's not you at all."

"I just need something that will keep my mind off things, off my problems and the injustice of this world. And I think that music and some dancing will do the trick."

"Yeah, and maybe some wine too," she added with a smirk.

I grinned. "Yeah."

"There's just one problem."

"What?" I asked with a frown.

"I don't have a dress."

"It's not too late to go get one," he said. "We'll go to the mall, some stores are still opened."

"But Mac..."

"I'm gonna pay for it, don't worry."

"Mac!"

"Don't worry, I said."

"No Mac, you ain't buying me a dress."

"Yes I am. Let's go."

We waved the first cab we saw and he drove us to the closest mall. I followed Stella through the many stores until she found a dress that she liked. Obviously, she picked the sexiest one there was out there; a long, red dress with a beautiful detailing at the waist and a V-neck which showed considerably cleavage.

"Mac, you can't pay for this, I mean it costs too much."

"No it doesn't cost too much," I replied, giving the money to the woman behind the counter.

"Mac..."

"Stella, can't you just stop complaining? I'm buying you a dress, just shut up!"

"Oh, that's nice," she said, folding her arms across her chest."

"You have shoes that go with this?" I asked her.

She nodded. "Yeah and there's no way you're buying me a new pair, Taylor. Fortunately, I bought some high heels which will go perfectly with this... And what about you? What will ya wear?"

"I've got something in my baggage," I replied. "Now let's go back to our hotel and change."

Stella shook her head in disbelief and followed me with her shopping bag in her hand. "You're insane, Mac. You're scaring me..."

So we quickly went to our rooms to change into more formal clothes. I've got to say, I couldn't wait to see Stella in that beautiful dress. She would look gorgeous for sure.

As for me, I put on a clean suite with a nice tie and then waited outside in the hallway while Stella was getting ready. It took her so much time I wondered if she would ever get out of that room.

"I'm ready!" she suddenly said, bursting out of her room.

I scanned her from head to toe and couldn't help but to gasp at her beauty. Her curls were lose, falling over her shoulders and her green eyes sparkled like crystals. "Y-You're beautiful," I said.

She laughed shyly and blushed. "Uh, thanks Mac. You look pretty amazing yourself, by the way."

We both exchanged a smile and went outside. Again, a cab drove us to club. When we arrived there, the music was blasting, people were dancing, singing and screaming loudly. "Whoa," Stella chuckled. "This place's crazy!"

It was my turn to laugh. "Yeah, let's go get some drinks."

She nodded and made her way through to crowd. We finally reached the counter and ordered our drinks. Of course, I paid for both of us even though Stella insisted on paying. "I'm treating you tonight," I told her.

"Don't you think you've treated me enough already?" she replied. "You bought me a two hundred dollar dress, remember?"

"Yes, and? What's wrong with wanting to please your friends?"

She rolled her eyes and thanked the barman as he gave her her drink. "You know you've been the most bizarre person on this Earth the last few days?"

I laughed. "Whadaya mean?"

"You just weren't yourself," she answered. "Being dirty minded, spontaneous... everything about you was just different."

"Is that a bad thing?"

She blushed and smirked. "Actually, it's quite pleasant, I've got to admit. I love that side of you—that hidden side."

I grinned and set down my drink on the counter. "Then, can I ask you to dance?"

Her eyes glowed as she heard my question. "Of course."

I grabbed her hand and took her to the dance floor. "Did I tell you you looked more than gorgeous tonight?" I said in a soft tone.

"Thanks, Mac."

"I'm glad to have you in my life, Stella. Nothing could explain my immense gratitude."

"I'm glad to have you in my life as well, Mac. I can honestly say if it weren't of you, I would probably have gotten insane by now. You helped me alone, y'know..."

"That's what partners do, right?"

She nodded. "Right."

The music had changed to a slower song—a beautiful song. I listened closely to the lyrics and realized how beautiful they actually were. It made me realized how lame my life had been during the past years, how dumb I had been, isolating myself from the outside world to mourn alone in darkness. I hadn't been capable of seeing something else than gloom—or had refused to search for a source of light.

_Sitting here wasted and wounded at this old piano_

_Trying hard to capture the moment this morning I don't know_

_'Cause a bottle of vodka's still lodged in my head_

_And some blonde gave me nightmares; I think that she's still in my bed_

_As I dream about movies they won't make of me when I'm dead._

All those years, I had committed to despondency and had forced myself to stay in a state of despair. Only tonight I seemed to realize that life still had to go on even though I had been wounded by life's inequity. Even though my heart had been shattered hundred of times, even though my soul had been weeping, I had to stop grieving and start living...

_With an ironclad fist, I wake up and french kiss the morning_

_While some marching band keeps its own beat in my head while we're talking_

_About all of the things that I long to believe,_

_About love, the truth, what you mean to me_

_And the truth is, baby you're all that I need._

I had to stop hoping for miracles to happen, for life to drop happiness upon me and start helping my own self. Nothing would happen to me if I didn't work to make it happen. I guess I had to let go of those ridiculous illusions and get out of my comfort zone. I had to get out there and make the first move. Because if I didn't, I would be alone for the rest of my life. And that was the last thing I wanted to happen to me...

We danced closer and closer as the song played. Our hands were slowly getting familiar with each other's body. I smiled as I noticed inerasable smile on Stella's flawless face. "Stella," I softly said. "I think it's time I tell you something."

"What?" she asked, confused.

I leaned forward and gently pressed my lips against hers.

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses_

_For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails_

_I want to be just as close as, the Holy Ghost is,_

_And lay you down on a bed of roses._

After a moment, we separated and reached out for air. I had always thought that kissing Stella would feel good but not as good as this. "Mac..." she croaked. "I think I love you..."

I chuckled and took her in my arms. "I've always loved you, Stella. I was just too much of a coward to let you know."

_Well I'm so far away_

_Each step that I take is on my way home_

_A king's ransom in dimes I'd give each night_

_To see through this payphone_

_Still I run out of time or it's hard to get through_

_Till the bird on the wire flies me back to you_

_I'll just close my eyes and whisper, baby blind love is true_

I promised myself never to keep my feelings hidden inside me anymore. I never thought I would ever have the guts to do this. What seemed so hard and impossible to do back then seemed so easy tonight as she was standing there in front of me, looking as beautiful as ever.

"But Mac, you think this is wrong?"

"Why would it be?" I asked, looking into her beautiful eyes.

"'Cause Claire's still alive."

"I can't plan my life on possibilities anymore, Stella. I've got to go with my guts and what seems right at the moment. And what seems right, right now, is to be with you."

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses_

_For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails_

_I want to be just as close as, the Holy Ghost is,_

_And lay you down on a bed of roses._

"You're sure you're making the right decision, Mac? Because if you change your mind, I'll be broken."

I shook my head. "I'm as convinced as I'll ever be, Stella. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to live my life with what's real, with what's truly there; not with ghosts and memories. Sure, I have had a great life with my wife but I can't be sure she'll ever wake up again—she probably won't. I can't expect it all to be the same as before and I want a change."

A tear rolled down her cheek and I caught it with my hand. "I can't believe this is happening, Mac," she said. "I never thought it would. I thought it only happened in dreams. God, on how many nights I've dreamt of that moment... I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up alone again, Mac."

"Don't worry, baby, this is real, I'm telling you."

_The hotel bar hangover whiskey's gone dry_

_The barkeeper's wig's crooked_

_And she's giving me the eye_

_Well I might have said yeah_

_But I laughed so hard I think I died._

Seeing her so happy made me feel even better. Knowing for sure that she was sharing my feelings made me the happiest man on this Earth. I regretted all this time I've been spending, feeling sorry for myself while she was dreaming about me every night. I hated myself for not having noticed all of her sweet moves and comforting words which meant so much more than what I thought. All this time she was trying to send me a message, to tell me to move on, to give life another chance though I was too deep in my own misery to even be aware.

_Now as you close your eyes, know I'll be thinking about you_

_While my mistress she calls me to stand in her spotlight again_

_Tonight, I won't be alone but you know that don't mean I'm not lonely_

_I've got nothing to prove_

_For it's you that I'd die to defend._

The song continued to play and for the first time in our entire lives, we danced as lovers. For the first time in our lives, we both felt totally complete and happy. For the first time in our lives, we admitted our love for each other and accepted another lifestyle—a way better lifestyle. But then again, there was still a place we needed to be...

_I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses_

_For tonight I'll sleep on a bed of nails_

_I want to be just as close as, the Holy Ghost is,_

_And lay you down on a bed of roses._

...

Here, hope you liked the chapter. It's still not finished! Next ones coming soon! :)


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